This meditation exercise is based on principles taken from Mindfulness Meditation and Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT); Compassion Focused Therapy; and Brain Neuroplasticity. Making Peace with your emotions will allow you to slow down, accept emotions with compassion for yourself and others, and then choose actions that are in line with how you aspire to be in the midst of these strong emotions. PEACE brings together all of these principles to give you a resource to use when strong emotions show up.
“The greater part of human pain is unnecessary.
It is self-created as long as the unobserved mind runs your life.” ― Eckhart Tolle
The 5 steps are:
P – Pause
E – Examine
A – Allow
C – Compassion
E – Engage
P – Pause
Take a few breaths to ground you so you are able to step back into the role of an observer. Mindfully watching your breathing, giving yourself some space.
E – Examine
Examine and observe, with the curiosity of a child, what you are feeling and where you are feeling it in your body. Recognise and label the emotion.
A – Allow
Accept the “clean distress” of this pure emotion, without adding any judgements or struggles to get rid of it. You open yourself up to feeling it fully in this present moment. Even though you don’t want it, you allow it and lean into it.
C – Compassion
Soften towards yourself and others with kindness and compassion. Build up new brain pathways of compassion by saying kind words to yourself, the same words you would say to a hurting child or good friend. Activate the compassionate pathways in your brain by putting a friendly, kind expression on your face, perhaps with a half smile. Lay your hand on yourself to send some warmth and kindness inwards, just as you would comfort a child. Cultivate a compassionate witness to your emotion.
E – Engage
Now that you have paused and examined and allowed your feelings to be there with compassion, you have given yourself the space to choose how you will act. Rather than “reacting” you are in a position to “respond.” You can now engage again with the outside world in a way that lines up with your values and how you would like to be in the midst of this emotion.
P – Pause
E – Examine
A – Allow
C – Compassion
E – Engage
P – Pause
Take a few breaths to ground you so you are able to step back into the role of an observer. Mindfully watching your breathing, giving yourself some space.
E – Examine
Examine and observe, with the curiosity of a child, what you are feeling and where you are feeling it in your body. Recognise and label the emotion.
A – Allow
Accept the “clean distress” of this pure emotion, without adding any judgements or struggles to get rid of it. You open yourself up to feeling it fully in this present moment. Even though you don’t want it, you allow it and lean into it.
C – Compassion
Soften towards yourself and others with kindness and compassion. Build up new brain pathways of compassion by saying kind words to yourself, the same words you would say to a hurting child or good friend. Activate the compassionate pathways in your brain by putting a friendly, kind expression on your face, perhaps with a half smile. Lay your hand on yourself to send some warmth and kindness inwards, just as you would comfort a child. Cultivate a compassionate witness to your emotion.
E – Engage
Now that you have paused and examined and allowed your feelings to be there with compassion, you have given yourself the space to choose how you will act. Rather than “reacting” you are in a position to “respond.” You can now engage again with the outside world in a way that lines up with your values and how you would like to be in the midst of this emotion.
Applying PEACE
Initially practice this regularly, at times when you are not that upset, beginning with recalling previous situations when you were upset. Then move onto applying PEACE in real moments of minor emotional upset, as they are happening. With repeated practice, you will be familiar enough with the process to apply this very quickly in the midst of stronger emotional distress at the time that it happens. Eventually, when any strong emotions or urges show up, you will be able to respond, rather than react, with compassion and in a way that you aspire to be.
Follow this link for a free guided MP3 of the P-E-A-C-E Meditation Exercise.
Initially practice this regularly, at times when you are not that upset, beginning with recalling previous situations when you were upset. Then move onto applying PEACE in real moments of minor emotional upset, as they are happening. With repeated practice, you will be familiar enough with the process to apply this very quickly in the midst of stronger emotional distress at the time that it happens. Eventually, when any strong emotions or urges show up, you will be able to respond, rather than react, with compassion and in a way that you aspire to be.
Follow this link for a free guided MP3 of the P-E-A-C-E Meditation Exercise.